Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Why, oh, WHY?!

Here is a blog topic for ya: Blogging! It’s come up a lot lately around here. I have friends who are starting shiny new blogs, and friends who are becoming well known for their blogs. Some friends are making their blogs private and password protected, while others are practically starting mailing lists to keep people updated on the status of their laundry.

You know what I think? Do it! Whatever that means for you! My poor parents, I can’t imagine how many times they have innocently come here to see new pictures of a fat pink baby or a handsome dirty-dog five year old, and ended up seeing my feelings splattered all over the wall for people to read.

Sorry parents! I’ve warned you not to come here unless specifically instructed to by email!

Here is the thing I find the most odd and fascinating about blogging, I kinda don’t care what you think about me. And by that I mean my blog is my safe place to say I’m not ashamed of my human experience. And you’re welcome to read all about it because someday I’ll be dead, and when my grandchildren are dead and gone, no one is going read it ever again anyway. So you can read it :) YOU being the way in which I’m always trying to write so it will be interesting to anyone who reads this, but also so YOU and I can have an actual conversation about it later if we run into each other at the grocery (or liquor) store. And, gosh you guys, you make me feel so comfortable! I feel like I could really tell you anything! You should be a psychiatrist someday, I bet people always tell you what a good listener you are.

And that is where you break up with me.

That’s what makes writing and reading blogs so fascinating for me! There is this completely invisible and shifting line that is forming as our generation puts our toes in the water of this new universe. When you run into an old pal who exclaims “How are ya?!” you don’t want to be the person that spills your guts all over the floor of Target! Your dog has hemorrhoids, your brother got arrested again, your husband needs a pill for his chronically bad breath (all from posts I have read and LOVED), yet, what is to stop that same person from stumbling on your blog from facebook or a mutual acquaintance and now they know you’re a recovering Polly Pocket Addict so it doesn’t matter how much weight you lose before the next reunion, they. will. KNOW. 

I had an aha! moment when I read this post over at my friend Tara’s blog who is currently going through a painful separation from her husband, while somehow remaining completely hilarious:

While the whole thing is great and, once again, insanely well articulated, my actual moment of clarity happened when she quotes her friend,

“Tara, if you’re not a blogger or an avid reader of blogs, then this blogging thing probably seems puzzling and unimportant.  Its a phenomenon that you either ‘get’ and embrace as a valuable interest and talent, or you don’t.”

Well said, Tara’s friend.

So, yeah, I don’t care what people who come here think of me, because I already like you! But I do care that some of the stuff I write might make the people that I actually do see, or who are RELATED to me, cringe so badly they aren’t sure if they just had a blog induced stroke.

Again, I’m SORRY mom and dad! I’m sorry to all the mom’s and dads out there whose adult kids are picking up a domain name and a snarky attitude because we weren’t ever popular in high school and now we have to prove HOW witty and awesome we are to any stranger with a computer.

You guys should totally start a blog so you can swap stories about how all your kids are humiliating themselves on the internet.

Because at the end of the day, this is why I blog. FREE GROUP THERAPY. Like as in FREE. The only price you pay is brain damage from staring at a computer screen for too long, or carpel tunnel. Or a thriving and shining blog… but dirty, neglected children who will pummel you to death with Lego’s if you say “5 more minutes” one more time. 

Whew. That’s all for now.


…unless you would like to know one last embarrassing thing about me before you go?

Maybe, you can even muster up a little excitement for me?

This is so dumb.

So, for about 4 months now every once in a while I type in Polly Pocket Oz over at eBay to see what the going price is for the complete (you got it) Polly Pocket Wizard of Oz set. I mean you can get bits and pieces, but to get the complete set is around $90 to $250 bucks and while I’m sick, I’m not twisted! I can wait.

And wait.

And wait…. and then…

I saw this auction come up, and you know what it’s missing? One piece. Dorothy. A piece I somehow already have! 

So I watched…

and waited…

(I told you this is embarrassing)


$40 bucks!

I know, right?! (and I’m sure $40 bucks more than you would have paid!!)

I know it’s an odd hobby, but as long as we are exploring things that help my children be calm, I can’t begin to describe how entertained we are with these damn tiny treasure boxes. AND that movie. They are totally going to forgive me for the hour I took to write this post when they see it.

polly oz


Lorraine said...

thank you. sometimes I feel so stupid when I say to someone "didn't you read my blog? I sent you the link and I already mentioned this like 13 times." and then they admit that they just don't read blogs. and that is like 90% of the people I know. It makes me feel SO crummy sometimes.

and THEN, I found out that Dan's friends (who are also now my friends) all blog and read each other's blog, and now I have all sorts of new readers because they "get" blogging. It doesn't exactly make me any less bummed that some of my own BFFs will just never read my blog, but it's nice to have all new people to share with, and just to know that SOMEONE is reading. :)

also, that Polly Pocket would fit in NO ONE'S pocket.

Deanna said...

I love your blogs and I know I don't comment very often, but I love reading them. It does make me miss you though. Keep on posting.

Jared said...

first of all, jared would especially want me to say THIS IS NOT JARED. please fix this on my computer. secondly, this is your mother. see, i do read your blog (secretly)... you know that i do love you very much, almost totally unconditionally~

Tara said...

See, when you say, "I don't care if you don't like it, I'm going to keep writing about the good, the bad, and the ugly", it still manages to sound cheerful and kind.

When I say it, it's all growl-y and wounded sounding.

And you're right, my friend is super smart.

And I do wish there was a way for me to tell the internet not to let a particular person read a particular blog post. "Hey, internet! Do not let my mother-in-law read this one, okay? Thanks."

And I think it's awesome that your mom loves you almost unconditionally. :)

Tara said...

Oh, and you SO need to fix my blog info on your blogroll. The Daily Nusz is like, SO October 2010. Now we're all

Alissa Rae King said...

Lois, I read your blog! I have to, I'm your sister, but I would anyway cause you're weird and awesome. And you're only mad that oz wouldn't fit in your pocket because you would want to steal it from me!

Deanna! This is why a blog is groovy, and I'm glad you spy on me because it's totally mutual :)

Jared, thanks for loving me almost unconditionally, maybe I will almost fix your computer so you can leave me such charming messages with your real name... love you, mom :)

Tara! Glad you saw this post, where do you find the time?! I updated you on my blogroll, FINALLY. I have been following you through facebook, but now people can find you from here so they can join my midnight hysterics about how Justin Beiber is dead. FOR REAL.

Andrea said...

While I am always a week late on reading blogs, and a month (or more) late on posting, I get it and love catching up with you! (And I love your polly oz world thing.)

Kings said...

You really are hilarious Alissa! I love how honest and real you are! LOVE. IT.